Refgrunt 4/15/22
4 years ago
a few words...
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wow. this is very weird.
after a full 380 days plus away, it's very different to see the plain non-facebook format of blogger again vs what i log in to about three or four times a day, via desktop or mobile (addict? maybe.)
so a few things i felt i may want to address just for the sake of posting.
what's different in over a year?
wow. so very much. and yet? some things remain the same.
mark and i are happy. 9 years plus. love you, baby. even when you have to leave to hit the road as a musician. and i miss your birthday without you :( (we'll make up for it shortly!)
we have george lopez (age 4), quinn (on his way to 11), lucy (the senior at 15) & ellie (turning 8). all animals.
we both have the same careers. last september i added a 3rd job as a run lead out of the lifetime fitness in roseville. which only means i help talk about running to people who won't criticize me for it, and i try to help find those who want to even start walking join in a healthier lifestyle. and the tiny bit of extra dough is nice to put away for future events. so i lead a run once a week, and take folks around the streets and paths of roseville, year round.
the library is the same and yet different. we have a new library in new brighton. that used to be in arden hills.
we have staff members in flux wondering if a program that has been long standing will continue and allow for future growth.
our business in my library since opening on july 10, 2010 has exploded. (some good points here. the bosses love high numbers. for those on the front lines it is extremely stressful yet rewarding at the same time.)
compound that with severely short staffed buildings due to budget cuts, *and* forcing the librarians to unionize, and you have the lowest staff morale ever. apparently some people i work with decided our management wasn't good enough for hearing their complaints, so they decided to form a coup, that less than half of our professionals believe in. (nothing like having 'big brother' watching who's going on vacation when and then complaining about it.) and for those who only show up to get a paycheck and never put in extra time (or god forbid, come in on a day off to get things DONE) it makes me thankful i share an office with people who believe in much my same views.
i love my job in most ways. but some days just make me wonder how the heck it can get much worse or full in terms of what we can offer in such a crisis of staff duties and body counts. for me, it's more than just a paycheck. it's finding that connection with your community. and for that, i'm thankful.
hmmm. what else is different?
friendships have changed. or formed. or dissolved. all of the above. thankful for the good, disheartened for the bad. somehow i thought you magically get to an age where you don't lose friends. not true. at least so far, on my way to age 38. but finding the new ones? blissful.
other news.
some babies have been born, we've all grown older, and mark and i are still childless. which is how life is. but yet, if i (or more often, someone else) asks how running is? i talk about life in that regard. sometimes i get the eyeroll and 'are we talking about running again??' factor from those people who don't run or don't get it.
i am more than happy (and often *initiate*) conversations with people about their kids and families and what's new. i love kids, i just don't happen to have birthed any. i sure have felt like i've seen a great many grow up in my 10 years in the public eye, and for that i'm thankful.
i try not to criticize anyone else's hobbies or passions, whether they be football, star wars, trading cards, pregnancy, kids or online gaming. to each their own.
funny how more than half of my close close friends are either single or childless. both 'unspoken' minorities in my book. is there anything wrong with either group?
absolutely not. but yet, both sets of these folks are looked at as 'why aren't you married?' or 'why don't you have kids?' 'what's wrong with you?'
i'm sorry. i don't ask you to not complain when your kids might be getting to you, or all 3 are sick, or you haven't slept in 2 weeks because of that ear infection Jr. has. so please don't criticize me if i go on vacation every other weekend in summer because i happen to not work, or that i happen to have run a race this weekend that another person has asked me about...i never thought making or having a child or family makes anyone 'normal' or 'better'.
this world is full of an awesome mix of all of us, and that is what makes it robust and interesting.
do i love talking and actually running? of course. that IS hobby/passion/other life.
but do i enjoy a good cup of coffee and talking about adventures or good food or books or wine or dogs or the news? i DO. ask me about *that* sometime.
i'm looking forward to the winter season as, true to the planner i am, and the friends i have found that adore adventures too, we have much to look forward to!
i am not looking forward to the next 12 days of insanity as the budget year ends at work. add in facebook going all wacked out and forcing me to update my handout for class in mid november, and missing some coworkers who have moved on that were awesome to teach with, and it's not what it was. but not everything stays that way. one day at a time, and all will be well. i believe in the glass half full. it's better for everyone. would you want to talk to someone who's sour all of the time about every thing possible?
me neither.
here's to year 44 for mark and year 38 for me around the proverbial bend.
whew. i'm tired.
after a full 380 days plus away, it's very different to see the plain non-facebook format of blogger again vs what i log in to about three or four times a day, via desktop or mobile (addict? maybe.)
so a few things i felt i may want to address just for the sake of posting.
what's different in over a year?
wow. so very much. and yet? some things remain the same.
mark and i are happy. 9 years plus. love you, baby. even when you have to leave to hit the road as a musician. and i miss your birthday without you :( (we'll make up for it shortly!)
we have george lopez (age 4), quinn (on his way to 11), lucy (the senior at 15) & ellie (turning 8). all animals.
we both have the same careers. last september i added a 3rd job as a run lead out of the lifetime fitness in roseville. which only means i help talk about running to people who won't criticize me for it, and i try to help find those who want to even start walking join in a healthier lifestyle. and the tiny bit of extra dough is nice to put away for future events. so i lead a run once a week, and take folks around the streets and paths of roseville, year round.
the library is the same and yet different. we have a new library in new brighton. that used to be in arden hills.
we have staff members in flux wondering if a program that has been long standing will continue and allow for future growth.
our business in my library since opening on july 10, 2010 has exploded. (some good points here. the bosses love high numbers. for those on the front lines it is extremely stressful yet rewarding at the same time.)
compound that with severely short staffed buildings due to budget cuts, *and* forcing the librarians to unionize, and you have the lowest staff morale ever. apparently some people i work with decided our management wasn't good enough for hearing their complaints, so they decided to form a coup, that less than half of our professionals believe in. (nothing like having 'big brother' watching who's going on vacation when and then complaining about it.) and for those who only show up to get a paycheck and never put in extra time (or god forbid, come in on a day off to get things DONE) it makes me thankful i share an office with people who believe in much my same views.
i love my job in most ways. but some days just make me wonder how the heck it can get much worse or full in terms of what we can offer in such a crisis of staff duties and body counts. for me, it's more than just a paycheck. it's finding that connection with your community. and for that, i'm thankful.
hmmm. what else is different?
friendships have changed. or formed. or dissolved. all of the above. thankful for the good, disheartened for the bad. somehow i thought you magically get to an age where you don't lose friends. not true. at least so far, on my way to age 38. but finding the new ones? blissful.
other news.
some babies have been born, we've all grown older, and mark and i are still childless. which is how life is. but yet, if i (or more often, someone else) asks how running is? i talk about life in that regard. sometimes i get the eyeroll and 'are we talking about running again??' factor from those people who don't run or don't get it.
i am more than happy (and often *initiate*) conversations with people about their kids and families and what's new. i love kids, i just don't happen to have birthed any. i sure have felt like i've seen a great many grow up in my 10 years in the public eye, and for that i'm thankful.
i try not to criticize anyone else's hobbies or passions, whether they be football, star wars, trading cards, pregnancy, kids or online gaming. to each their own.
funny how more than half of my close close friends are either single or childless. both 'unspoken' minorities in my book. is there anything wrong with either group?
absolutely not. but yet, both sets of these folks are looked at as 'why aren't you married?' or 'why don't you have kids?' 'what's wrong with you?'
i'm sorry. i don't ask you to not complain when your kids might be getting to you, or all 3 are sick, or you haven't slept in 2 weeks because of that ear infection Jr. has. so please don't criticize me if i go on vacation every other weekend in summer because i happen to not work, or that i happen to have run a race this weekend that another person has asked me about...i never thought making or having a child or family makes anyone 'normal' or 'better'.
this world is full of an awesome mix of all of us, and that is what makes it robust and interesting.
do i love talking and actually running? of course. that IS hobby/passion/other life.
but do i enjoy a good cup of coffee and talking about adventures or good food or books or wine or dogs or the news? i DO. ask me about *that* sometime.
i'm looking forward to the winter season as, true to the planner i am, and the friends i have found that adore adventures too, we have much to look forward to!
i am not looking forward to the next 12 days of insanity as the budget year ends at work. add in facebook going all wacked out and forcing me to update my handout for class in mid november, and missing some coworkers who have moved on that were awesome to teach with, and it's not what it was. but not everything stays that way. one day at a time, and all will be well. i believe in the glass half full. it's better for everyone. would you want to talk to someone who's sour all of the time about every thing possible?
me neither.
here's to year 44 for mark and year 38 for me around the proverbial bend.
whew. i'm tired.
when it's time...
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i'll whine. i'll hurt. i'll sweat. i'll probably cry a little. and might even bleed.
runs that go AMAZINGLY well and you're like 'yes, as a matter of fact, i *do* kick asphalt. why yes, i *should* wear a cape!'
runs that go so poorly after you've tried to do everything right that day. eat. hydrate. yada yada. and you STILL end up in GI distress for no effing reason.
at the beginning, after a long hiatus away, every step is hard.
most days i don't want to get up in the dark.
or cold.
time wanders on and i grow sick of bananas.
sick of pasta.
tired of 'no, you can't have that half a bag of potato chips. that won't digest well for your run later.'
tired of not being able to drink any friday night wine for 16 weeks. (even less 3 weeks from the start.) (yes, clearly i have never had kids for those who don't know me.)
running for 7 miles feeling like a marathon.
running for 8 miles.
running for 3+ hours straight. just as 'practice'.
buying gu's by the case. because you need em often when you go through 2-4 every weekend for a solid 8 weeks or so...
and then?
the magical day will come. the sun will rise early. the mojo and anticipation will literally pump from the heart through the body.
no sleep the night before. a few hours if you're lucky. restless sleep.
writing your name on your arm in the biggest sharpie they sell.
not trying anything new on race day. EVER. EVER EVER EVER.
sunscreen all over your body. (4+ hours out there can roast you right good if you're fair like me...)
then the bus ride to the start (the 'holy sh*t, i have to run back ALL THIS WAY?' moment happens.)
no matter how many marathons you've run, i think every runner goes through some version or another of all of the above.
i am 2 weeks away from the official start of training for marathon number five.
bought new training shoes today, spanking glowing white, wrapped in their perfect tissue paper enchilada, just waiting to be put on the first time, the 2nd, the 157th time to hit the real open road for 250 miles or so of 'practice'...
i dread part of it. i feel inadequate. i'm not worthy.
and yet, i'll work my ass literally off, feel horrible doing it some of the time and feel like i rule my own little universe the rest when i DO go out and workout 3-4 times a week, diligently, good or bad.
fact: no one makes it to the finish line if they don't put in the work and time.
watch any major race finish line. those people who look like the walking dead at the end? they did something wrong. not to criticize unnecessarily, but they did. if you run smart, train smart and stick to your plan? you will finish. standing up. happy. crying maybe, but not looking like you might curl up in a coffin at any moment because you made poor choices somewhere along the way...
i'll run alone sometimes during the coming months, but more often than not i'll be with friends.
who share the same sick twisted passion for pain and accomplishment.
and that finish line on june 18? will be the end of the winding road to sweet freedom of what one CAN do if they concentrate, focus and dream big.
anyone can have a dream. a want. a passion. an adventure to try out. (or repeat).
mine just happens to involve a lot of running around.
as john bingham loves to say, waddle on, friends. waddle on.
runs that go AMAZINGLY well and you're like 'yes, as a matter of fact, i *do* kick asphalt. why yes, i *should* wear a cape!'
runs that go so poorly after you've tried to do everything right that day. eat. hydrate. yada yada. and you STILL end up in GI distress for no effing reason.
at the beginning, after a long hiatus away, every step is hard.
most days i don't want to get up in the dark.
or cold.
time wanders on and i grow sick of bananas.
sick of pasta.
tired of 'no, you can't have that half a bag of potato chips. that won't digest well for your run later.'
tired of not being able to drink any friday night wine for 16 weeks. (even less 3 weeks from the start.) (yes, clearly i have never had kids for those who don't know me.)
running for 7 miles feeling like a marathon.
running for 8 miles.
running for 3+ hours straight. just as 'practice'.
buying gu's by the case. because you need em often when you go through 2-4 every weekend for a solid 8 weeks or so...
and then?
the magical day will come. the sun will rise early. the mojo and anticipation will literally pump from the heart through the body.
no sleep the night before. a few hours if you're lucky. restless sleep.
writing your name on your arm in the biggest sharpie they sell.
not trying anything new on race day. EVER. EVER EVER EVER.
sunscreen all over your body. (4+ hours out there can roast you right good if you're fair like me...)
then the bus ride to the start (the 'holy sh*t, i have to run back ALL THIS WAY?' moment happens.)
no matter how many marathons you've run, i think every runner goes through some version or another of all of the above.
i am 2 weeks away from the official start of training for marathon number five.
bought new training shoes today, spanking glowing white, wrapped in their perfect tissue paper enchilada, just waiting to be put on the first time, the 2nd, the 157th time to hit the real open road for 250 miles or so of 'practice'...
i dread part of it. i feel inadequate. i'm not worthy.
and yet, i'll work my ass literally off, feel horrible doing it some of the time and feel like i rule my own little universe the rest when i DO go out and workout 3-4 times a week, diligently, good or bad.
fact: no one makes it to the finish line if they don't put in the work and time.
watch any major race finish line. those people who look like the walking dead at the end? they did something wrong. not to criticize unnecessarily, but they did. if you run smart, train smart and stick to your plan? you will finish. standing up. happy. crying maybe, but not looking like you might curl up in a coffin at any moment because you made poor choices somewhere along the way...
i'll run alone sometimes during the coming months, but more often than not i'll be with friends.
who share the same sick twisted passion for pain and accomplishment.
and that finish line on june 18? will be the end of the winding road to sweet freedom of what one CAN do if they concentrate, focus and dream big.
anyone can have a dream. a want. a passion. an adventure to try out. (or repeat).
mine just happens to involve a lot of running around.
as john bingham loves to say, waddle on, friends. waddle on.
christmas 2010
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Snowing Joy Christmas
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2 weeks from now...
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it's camping time!!
planning with the set of friends we're heading to ely with tomorrow night.
this week it's time to try and set up that $30 (originally $200) screen tent I got at REI at their scratch n dent sale on new years day. i know it has a small hole. fixable. but it's always wise to do a test run of the tent set up before heading out to the wilds (yo ally, this was not a slam atcha. honest. you are queen of adventure :) but mostly i just want to see what it looks like set up..
i heart camping.
here's to the summer's adventures ahead...
planning with the set of friends we're heading to ely with tomorrow night.
this week it's time to try and set up that $30 (originally $200) screen tent I got at REI at their scratch n dent sale on new years day. i know it has a small hole. fixable. but it's always wise to do a test run of the tent set up before heading out to the wilds (yo ally, this was not a slam atcha. honest. you are queen of adventure :) but mostly i just want to see what it looks like set up..
i heart camping.
here's to the summer's adventures ahead...
sunday night. 7-9pm...
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literally?
the first time ALL WEEKEND i have gotten to sit down and do NOTHING.
true story.
i love to be busy. i strive to get schtuff done.
this weekend was a ton of working, running, running around, erranding, planting, seeing a musical and biking my keester off today. 41.5 miles off. only counting because the 150 mile 2 day ride is just over a month away...
i swallowed dinner in about 10 bites total tonight.
and i can't believe i'm looking forward to going to work for 3 days this week as *rest*. i'll shelve or put carts in order or check in and help patrons like a worker bee. but most of it? will feel like a break from the training season i am fully submerged in...not complaining. really. just striving for some kind of balance..
4 days til i get a REAL vacation to florida with ms. gail. can. not. wait. the last time we took a girls only trip?
2002.
now to pray the oil stays away from the florida coast near ft myers :( such a horrendously sad story...
have a great first week of may.
happy 33rd birthday to my little bro, the firefighter in bensonville, IL...
~jd
the first time ALL WEEKEND i have gotten to sit down and do NOTHING.
true story.
i love to be busy. i strive to get schtuff done.
this weekend was a ton of working, running, running around, erranding, planting, seeing a musical and biking my keester off today. 41.5 miles off. only counting because the 150 mile 2 day ride is just over a month away...
i swallowed dinner in about 10 bites total tonight.
and i can't believe i'm looking forward to going to work for 3 days this week as *rest*. i'll shelve or put carts in order or check in and help patrons like a worker bee. but most of it? will feel like a break from the training season i am fully submerged in...not complaining. really. just striving for some kind of balance..
4 days til i get a REAL vacation to florida with ms. gail. can. not. wait. the last time we took a girls only trip?
2002.
now to pray the oil stays away from the florida coast near ft myers :( such a horrendously sad story...
have a great first week of may.
happy 33rd birthday to my little bro, the firefighter in bensonville, IL...
~jd
the past few weeks...
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a few things and goings on:
*learning to bike. a lot. miles and miles. longest ride was today. 40 miles. we're about 6 weeks from the MS 150 event...150 miles in 2 days. (and one good long rest day off on the 3rd day..) thank you to mr ryan for all he's done to help get a wonderful loaner bike ship shape and road ready for the miles i'm going to put on it...(and after a series of unforunate events and weekends, this day going really well was so welcome!)
*learning to swim. last week i swam the length of the pool for the first time. 4 times. here's to more of that.
*putting a sizable amount (most) of our tax refund (and home equity loan) into the big chore of new windows in the whole house. with one more year of tax refund credits, we really feel this is pretty important. so by the end of may? we'll have a shiny glass, no more down the screens/up the storms in the fall, and most importantly, our heating/cooling bills will DROP. thank goodness.
*libraryland is soon to be on the move again. back to the big digs. i have pictures but after a super long day i'm too lazy to go hook the camera up to download right now. believe me. it's a big building. but i think the staffing challenges of our library system completely rival the size of the building. or at least it sure feels that way right now. work has been more fun in the past. but this is just a roller coaster time and i'm looking forward to the big changes ahead. in the near and not so distant future..
*best way to end the weekend? borrowing the newly minted 4 year old maddie next door and taking her for a birthday treat at izzy's. her first trip. since i'm fresh out of kiddos here in my house? it's nice that stacy and travis are willing to give me a loaner for a little while :) they rock.
*may 22nd. my first co-race directorial debut at the Book It! 5K, proceeds going to the library. if you haven't signed up yet? just do it!
so so tired. guten nacht...
*learning to bike. a lot. miles and miles. longest ride was today. 40 miles. we're about 6 weeks from the MS 150 event...150 miles in 2 days. (and one good long rest day off on the 3rd day..) thank you to mr ryan for all he's done to help get a wonderful loaner bike ship shape and road ready for the miles i'm going to put on it...(and after a series of unforunate events and weekends, this day going really well was so welcome!)
*learning to swim. last week i swam the length of the pool for the first time. 4 times. here's to more of that.
*putting a sizable amount (most) of our tax refund (and home equity loan) into the big chore of new windows in the whole house. with one more year of tax refund credits, we really feel this is pretty important. so by the end of may? we'll have a shiny glass, no more down the screens/up the storms in the fall, and most importantly, our heating/cooling bills will DROP. thank goodness.
*libraryland is soon to be on the move again. back to the big digs. i have pictures but after a super long day i'm too lazy to go hook the camera up to download right now. believe me. it's a big building. but i think the staffing challenges of our library system completely rival the size of the building. or at least it sure feels that way right now. work has been more fun in the past. but this is just a roller coaster time and i'm looking forward to the big changes ahead. in the near and not so distant future..
*best way to end the weekend? borrowing the newly minted 4 year old maddie next door and taking her for a birthday treat at izzy's. her first trip. since i'm fresh out of kiddos here in my house? it's nice that stacy and travis are willing to give me a loaner for a little while :) they rock.
*may 22nd. my first co-race directorial debut at the Book It! 5K, proceeds going to the library. if you haven't signed up yet? just do it!
so so tired. guten nacht...
what makes a great weekend?
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saturday: my first double digit run since late january in phoenix (sat 4.3.10, 10 miles at 10:25 pace) that went *really* well....
(runners will know, but for those that don't, sometimes runs go fabulously and sometimes they go horribly. and sometimes they're just okay. you can do the same prep before the run and it's literally a roll of the dice as to how it'll go. so when the GOOD ones happen? you love it and it instills in you why you do it to begin with...)
sunday: everyone is hunting eggs or giving baskets to kiddos, and the rest are with family or friends, or both. mark and i? decide that once the breakfast burritos and a little bit of work for me are done, it's time to explore by bike! we start with a vague plan, & wind up riding in to some of the flooded mississippi river trails (mud, water, logs and all), find the higher ground routes, more trails, and lots of exploring! 21.5 miles later? an awesome tour of st paul has happened and despite the saddles being a little sore, we'll take the 2 hour workout adventure that was more fun than feeling like work...
end the night with some homemade pasta and a long overdue (like *years*) dinner date with friends and that? is a great weekend!
up this week? work work swim run bon jovi work & riding. the new challenge is riding 150 miles in 2 days in june. the bike and i? best get to it on being bff's....
(runners will know, but for those that don't, sometimes runs go fabulously and sometimes they go horribly. and sometimes they're just okay. you can do the same prep before the run and it's literally a roll of the dice as to how it'll go. so when the GOOD ones happen? you love it and it instills in you why you do it to begin with...)
sunday: everyone is hunting eggs or giving baskets to kiddos, and the rest are with family or friends, or both. mark and i? decide that once the breakfast burritos and a little bit of work for me are done, it's time to explore by bike! we start with a vague plan, & wind up riding in to some of the flooded mississippi river trails (mud, water, logs and all), find the higher ground routes, more trails, and lots of exploring! 21.5 miles later? an awesome tour of st paul has happened and despite the saddles being a little sore, we'll take the 2 hour workout adventure that was more fun than feeling like work...
end the night with some homemade pasta and a long overdue (like *years*) dinner date with friends and that? is a great weekend!
up this week? work work swim run bon jovi work & riding. the new challenge is riding 150 miles in 2 days in june. the bike and i? best get to it on being bff's....
i lost my faith a little bit today..
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in humanity.
a patron comes in. super regular nice awesome family.
kids are kids however.
5 1/2 year old melts down. hard. boneless. sobbing. the works.
(noted: she has a 14 month old and 9 year old with her too; including books to check out and a stroller to deal with).
patrons on the internet 10 feet away flip out. FLIP. OUT.
so much so that this poor mother is not only subjected to a man coming all the way out from the internet cave to my desk to loudly complain 'HOW MUCH LONGER DO WE HAVE TO LISTEN TO THIS???' to 5 min later having a lady *herself* verbally confront and yell at the mom in telling her to "LEAVE. NOW. Take him home!". only to have added people at other terminals echo out loud 'yeah! we've had enough!' (really people?? REALLY??)
yeah, that makes the situation better on all fronts. (and like the mom wasn't trying to do that with above mentioned things she had to wrestle with).
i totally defended (she's doing the best she can! this is a public place...) and tried to physically help the mom out. the lack of humanity i witnessed from the mean people made me so frustrated at how soul-less and heartless some people are.
thankfully i believe there to be less of them than the good eggs.
not surprisingly it's full moon in 2 days. may they crawl back under their crabby rocks anytime now...
a patron comes in. super regular nice awesome family.
kids are kids however.
5 1/2 year old melts down. hard. boneless. sobbing. the works.
(noted: she has a 14 month old and 9 year old with her too; including books to check out and a stroller to deal with).
patrons on the internet 10 feet away flip out. FLIP. OUT.
so much so that this poor mother is not only subjected to a man coming all the way out from the internet cave to my desk to loudly complain 'HOW MUCH LONGER DO WE HAVE TO LISTEN TO THIS???' to 5 min later having a lady *herself* verbally confront and yell at the mom in telling her to "LEAVE. NOW. Take him home!". only to have added people at other terminals echo out loud 'yeah! we've had enough!' (really people?? REALLY??)
yeah, that makes the situation better on all fronts. (and like the mom wasn't trying to do that with above mentioned things she had to wrestle with).
i totally defended (she's doing the best she can! this is a public place...) and tried to physically help the mom out. the lack of humanity i witnessed from the mean people made me so frustrated at how soul-less and heartless some people are.
thankfully i believe there to be less of them than the good eggs.
not surprisingly it's full moon in 2 days. may they crawl back under their crabby rocks anytime now...
there are some days...
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the tequila, mix, salt & lime can't hit the glass fast enough.
this?
was one of those days....
not used to the 'norm'...
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this whole one job thing.
on one hand? it's great!
on the other? it sucks. not just the lack of money. i miss seeing my other work friends. working with grown ups. serving people. having my boss teach me how to make a latte. the *right* way. feeling challenged. learning new beers. foods. everything.
so gail? i am really lost today. this is the first weekend since the fire that i have a 3 day weekend with no library work, and no blackbird. no meetings about fundraisers. no happy hours. and i'm a little lost.
so i cleaned the house. had lunch with mark at a fantastic cuban joint in mpls. we haven't really seen each other in a full week. his schedule has been all kinds of dysfunctional lately...
on the flip side, the year long planned trip with my other gail (bff of 30 years) to florida in may is booked! woot!
happy weekend, whatever may come your way...
on one hand? it's great!
on the other? it sucks. not just the lack of money. i miss seeing my other work friends. working with grown ups. serving people. having my boss teach me how to make a latte. the *right* way. feeling challenged. learning new beers. foods. everything.
so gail? i am really lost today. this is the first weekend since the fire that i have a 3 day weekend with no library work, and no blackbird. no meetings about fundraisers. no happy hours. and i'm a little lost.
so i cleaned the house. had lunch with mark at a fantastic cuban joint in mpls. we haven't really seen each other in a full week. his schedule has been all kinds of dysfunctional lately...
on the flip side, the year long planned trip with my other gail (bff of 30 years) to florida in may is booked! woot!
happy weekend, whatever may come your way...
melting time and mud...
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minnesota is officially in the downslide of winter.
the back yard has lost about 6 inches or more of snowpack in the past week.
swamp season (where the yard is just one soupy disgusting mess) is upon us.
which means it's time to walk the dog again. just one. cora lived for walks. quinn really doesn't care one way or the other. he's happy to go on a walk, but cora *lived* for that. as it gets warmer, the folks who's houses we passed every morning will start asking where the other one is. :(
library construction is on track, and i hope to scoot in in the coming weeks to see the new digs. the last time i saw it was about 2 months ago. so much has happened in the interior since then...
aiming for a july 10 huge grand opening soiree...and may 22nd is the Book It! Library 5K. i hope all of my local folks can take part! it's family friendly and it gives the public a sneak peek of the new building if they take part :)
running season has started, which is good as i took to eating too many donuts and sweets over the winter and officially have some pants i can't fit into :( damn.
still bummed that i have no 2nd job, but at the same time, i'm rather enjoying the life of just one job, and one big time hobby that takes up much time in itself. if i can do without a 2nd job til blackbird reopens (i definitely want to go back..but it's way too early to see when that might be), then i'll have to scrimp even more in budget and just figure out how to get by. quite honestly? i don't want to start over at a new place. working only 1 or 2 shifts a week makes it very hard to fit into a small restaurant, so i'm hoping the bird reopens sooner than later. we'll see. they were well insured, but there's a ton of paperwork and procedures and decisions the owners have to make before i'll have any sense (or for that matter, they too) before we know what's what and when they'll be cooking for their fans again.
right now, i have many responsibilities to take care of winding up the final 2 months in our temporary library home, and ordering a bunch of shiny happy books for the new digs.
life moves on. just a bumpy road sometimes...
the back yard has lost about 6 inches or more of snowpack in the past week.
swamp season (where the yard is just one soupy disgusting mess) is upon us.
which means it's time to walk the dog again. just one. cora lived for walks. quinn really doesn't care one way or the other. he's happy to go on a walk, but cora *lived* for that. as it gets warmer, the folks who's houses we passed every morning will start asking where the other one is. :(
library construction is on track, and i hope to scoot in in the coming weeks to see the new digs. the last time i saw it was about 2 months ago. so much has happened in the interior since then...
aiming for a july 10 huge grand opening soiree...and may 22nd is the Book It! Library 5K. i hope all of my local folks can take part! it's family friendly and it gives the public a sneak peek of the new building if they take part :)
running season has started, which is good as i took to eating too many donuts and sweets over the winter and officially have some pants i can't fit into :( damn.
still bummed that i have no 2nd job, but at the same time, i'm rather enjoying the life of just one job, and one big time hobby that takes up much time in itself. if i can do without a 2nd job til blackbird reopens (i definitely want to go back..but it's way too early to see when that might be), then i'll have to scrimp even more in budget and just figure out how to get by. quite honestly? i don't want to start over at a new place. working only 1 or 2 shifts a week makes it very hard to fit into a small restaurant, so i'm hoping the bird reopens sooner than later. we'll see. they were well insured, but there's a ton of paperwork and procedures and decisions the owners have to make before i'll have any sense (or for that matter, they too) before we know what's what and when they'll be cooking for their fans again.
right now, i have many responsibilities to take care of winding up the final 2 months in our temporary library home, and ordering a bunch of shiny happy books for the new digs.
life moves on. just a bumpy road sometimes...
you never know...
Posted in on by
when the 'last' of something might happen until it's over.
today was that day.
i last went to work at blackbird on tuesday night. it was a veeeeeery slow evening tending bar with laura and anathea. left around 8pm. took my spicy peanut noodles to go, and had a night at home watching more olympics coverage.
monday, the library was closed. i worked my first (and for now, last) lunch shift. the same shift that crossed over today's tragic events.
today at 2pm i went to lunch from libraryland with a friend. left my cell at work. (unknowingly).
came back 45 min later to find 2 people looking for me with urgent messages.
my blackbird cafe was on fire.
tonight? it's a total loss.
the staff, most of them, gathered at another local mpls restaurant to mourn. and memorize (yes, i made that up). and be together.
i'm not sure what my next gig will be while the owners consider and hopefully do rebuild, but right now the numbness and surreal fact that i will never walk into blackbird again like i knew it is going to take time to grieve.
no one was hurt. everyone's okay. and things can be rebuilt. but it's still sucky to know my friends are out of jobs (their ONLY jobs) and everything they put into their little amazing hole in the wall is gone.
for now.
today was that day.
i last went to work at blackbird on tuesday night. it was a veeeeeery slow evening tending bar with laura and anathea. left around 8pm. took my spicy peanut noodles to go, and had a night at home watching more olympics coverage.
monday, the library was closed. i worked my first (and for now, last) lunch shift. the same shift that crossed over today's tragic events.
today at 2pm i went to lunch from libraryland with a friend. left my cell at work. (unknowingly).
came back 45 min later to find 2 people looking for me with urgent messages.
my blackbird cafe was on fire.
tonight? it's a total loss.
the staff, most of them, gathered at another local mpls restaurant to mourn. and memorize (yes, i made that up). and be together.
i'm not sure what my next gig will be while the owners consider and hopefully do rebuild, but right now the numbness and surreal fact that i will never walk into blackbird again like i knew it is going to take time to grieve.
no one was hurt. everyone's okay. and things can be rebuilt. but it's still sucky to know my friends are out of jobs (their ONLY jobs) and everything they put into their little amazing hole in the wall is gone.
for now.
hi david! and other news
Posted in on by
my one faithful blog reader :)
well, maybe not, but he wondered aloud what was up.
yes, i've been absent. apparently running is all i seem to talk about when i want to write.
or dying dogs.
(ps i still miss her like mad. she was incredible. she *was* my dog. quinn is SO mark's dog. which is great for those two...)
anywho. none of those topics are timely right now...
quinn is healthy as a horse (well he's going to need a serious dental cleaning once that tax refund comes through...) and still loveable but still hates the floors without carpet (scaaaaary slippery!) and still has a head full of white noise i think. he *is* different without his sis around. which we try to compensate for by snuggling on the couch more. (um, can we say retired?) but we're staying at a 1 dog house for now...
running is in Super Taper. that could be the newest marvel member.
i am running. just not much in terms of mileage. which is okay. i did finally sign up for chicago's marathon. it's on october 10th.
for those at home, that date would be 10-10-10. like the 07-07-07 3 years ago when every engaged couple felt they should marry. (and also on that july date a set of rockin' friends gave up the 'what you should do' and went for their dream of being your own boss. their little venture took flight on 07-07-07 as well. so this year, 10-10-10 just seems to be the date i should do my one marathon. back in the sweet home chicago way. (oh, i can almost taste the chicago dog and cheese fries now...)
other than that, i've been snowshoeing around the area when i can, and last weekend learned to cross country ski for the very first time. not sure why it took 36 years to learn, but i loved it and now covet my own skis and want to find trails near and far in the woods to explore...
swimming. that's up next. lessons start at the end of march. (have to register but that's the plan). taking them with a friend at a local pool...and this past weekend, i worked out with 2 friends at different gym location and did an hour in the pool. the deep end. running. (i had a belt on that kept me afloat). but still. running?? in water where you can't touch for almost an hour? solid core/ab workout. i feel it today.
summer 2010 is looking big.
2 Ragnar relays (200 miles, 12 runners, 2 vans of 6, handing off the slap bracelet). one in the wasatch back mountains near salt lake city, and one on the mississippi river side of wisconsin that ends at boom island in mpls. Ragnar = an amazing 30 hours or so. it's crazy. it's tiring. and it's 1000% a blast. i wouldn't have any reason to lie. one of those 'it takes one to know one' situations...
oh, also? directing (with help from 2 other awesome librarians) my first 5K walk/run on may 22, 2010. if you're local, i'd name my first born after you if you took part...all of those who take part get to see the new library FIRST. and of course there's a free t-shirt. jerry says you do races for the free t-shirt. and to support your local library. and it's kids reading garden. follow this yellow brick road if you can actually be there that day.
opening the big huge awesome sparkling jewel of a library on july 10. soft opening a few weeks prior.
and hopefully traveling out to the canadian rockies with my beloved (it's that or a possible back up plan) for a 10 day road/camping trip. we have never had such an adventure, so i'm extremely excited about the possibilities and the pictures i've been finding online...
up next? almost imminently, i'm heading to the north shore in 5 days for 3 nights (with mark and 2 other awesome friends), and then coming home for 3 nights, before driving *back* up with david. i haven't been to the shoreland in 8 months. for me? that's EONS. it's time. and the woods & lake are just as phenomenal in winter as in summer. the bonus? a fraction of the people up there. BLISS i tell you. i'll share my wilderness, but the idiots who are disrespectful and loud with mother nature do nothing but irk me. so having a peaceful quiet but awesome setting to almost myself and my loved ones? it can't be the weekends soon enough!
thanks to ally & her tri-man and his beautiful red dog i still haven't met for taking care of our remaining critters...they make leaving town be okay. we love that trust.
david? you rock. have a fantastic day. and thank you for really 'getting it'. there are few that do the way you do...
happy end to the month. pictures to come in a few weeks...
well, maybe not, but he wondered aloud what was up.
yes, i've been absent. apparently running is all i seem to talk about when i want to write.
or dying dogs.
(ps i still miss her like mad. she was incredible. she *was* my dog. quinn is SO mark's dog. which is great for those two...)
anywho. none of those topics are timely right now...
quinn is healthy as a horse (well he's going to need a serious dental cleaning once that tax refund comes through...) and still loveable but still hates the floors without carpet (scaaaaary slippery!) and still has a head full of white noise i think. he *is* different without his sis around. which we try to compensate for by snuggling on the couch more. (um, can we say retired?) but we're staying at a 1 dog house for now...
running is in Super Taper. that could be the newest marvel member.
i am running. just not much in terms of mileage. which is okay. i did finally sign up for chicago's marathon. it's on october 10th.
for those at home, that date would be 10-10-10. like the 07-07-07 3 years ago when every engaged couple felt they should marry. (and also on that july date a set of rockin' friends gave up the 'what you should do' and went for their dream of being your own boss. their little venture took flight on 07-07-07 as well. so this year, 10-10-10 just seems to be the date i should do my one marathon. back in the sweet home chicago way. (oh, i can almost taste the chicago dog and cheese fries now...)
other than that, i've been snowshoeing around the area when i can, and last weekend learned to cross country ski for the very first time. not sure why it took 36 years to learn, but i loved it and now covet my own skis and want to find trails near and far in the woods to explore...
swimming. that's up next. lessons start at the end of march. (have to register but that's the plan). taking them with a friend at a local pool...and this past weekend, i worked out with 2 friends at different gym location and did an hour in the pool. the deep end. running. (i had a belt on that kept me afloat). but still. running?? in water where you can't touch for almost an hour? solid core/ab workout. i feel it today.
summer 2010 is looking big.
2 Ragnar relays (200 miles, 12 runners, 2 vans of 6, handing off the slap bracelet). one in the wasatch back mountains near salt lake city, and one on the mississippi river side of wisconsin that ends at boom island in mpls. Ragnar = an amazing 30 hours or so. it's crazy. it's tiring. and it's 1000% a blast. i wouldn't have any reason to lie. one of those 'it takes one to know one' situations...
oh, also? directing (with help from 2 other awesome librarians) my first 5K walk/run on may 22, 2010. if you're local, i'd name my first born after you if you took part...all of those who take part get to see the new library FIRST. and of course there's a free t-shirt. jerry says you do races for the free t-shirt. and to support your local library. and it's kids reading garden. follow this yellow brick road if you can actually be there that day.
opening the big huge awesome sparkling jewel of a library on july 10. soft opening a few weeks prior.
and hopefully traveling out to the canadian rockies with my beloved (it's that or a possible back up plan) for a 10 day road/camping trip. we have never had such an adventure, so i'm extremely excited about the possibilities and the pictures i've been finding online...
up next? almost imminently, i'm heading to the north shore in 5 days for 3 nights (with mark and 2 other awesome friends), and then coming home for 3 nights, before driving *back* up with david. i haven't been to the shoreland in 8 months. for me? that's EONS. it's time. and the woods & lake are just as phenomenal in winter as in summer. the bonus? a fraction of the people up there. BLISS i tell you. i'll share my wilderness, but the idiots who are disrespectful and loud with mother nature do nothing but irk me. so having a peaceful quiet but awesome setting to almost myself and my loved ones? it can't be the weekends soon enough!
thanks to ally & her tri-man and his beautiful red dog i still haven't met for taking care of our remaining critters...they make leaving town be okay. we love that trust.
david? you rock. have a fantastic day. and thank you for really 'getting it'. there are few that do the way you do...
happy end to the month. pictures to come in a few weeks...
time...
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i have this weird relationship with time. good and not so good.
i can tell the time of day to almost the minute just by 'feeling' what the daylight is. without a watch around.
my body can wake up when i 'tell' it too, without an alarm (95% of the time).
3 weeks ago yesterday was cora's last day here. i am still completely heartbroken. almost every night, about now, bedtime, i cry. a lot. she was my best friend (besides mark.) she was HERE. and it felt RIGHT. and now it's empty. Quinn is a good boy (most of the time. okay, maybe half the time.) but he's not *her*. Right or wrong, that's the truth.
I noted on December 20th that 6 months had elapsed since completing my first marathon. In scorching heat and humidity. with some of the best people i never knew 2 years ago...
I look at a calendar on June 25th and think, 'huh. 6 months til Christmas'. (now folks will look at that date and think 'the day michael jackson died'. See?!?!?! there I go again! another silly tidbit I totally don't have to remember...)
I can remember my first real kiss (date, year, time) from way back when (nice try, Dad. not going to dish....)
I had an experience almost 2 years ago that shouldn't be anything I remember. But I do. There's so much *other* important data and info to keep straight in the world, what is my issue with time? Why remember something that's trivial?
I look at a calendar again, and see a date waaaay into the future (we're talking something fun we might have to look forward to in August *2011* for goodness sakes) and I get stoked.
who does that??
me.
like or not.
I am a planner.
I am a remember-er (good or not so good events).
so my relationship with time is a little schizophrenic. I love remembering the good. I dislike remembering the bad, and I long for times of 'before' that are no longer. Like adventures with my girl dog. I look forward to next summer's travels, but I pine for the time we had 2 months ago.
and then there's just enjoying the now.
which I do try to *not* take for granted. and just, well, enjoy.
be.
live.
so we end 2009. another year. another 365 days. and another set of selected random dates, events, times, that are imprinted on the ol' noggin'....those i enjoyed, those that were remarkable, those that were forgettable, those to learn from. and those? that just were.
for better or for worse.
this decade was a biggie.
finishing my MLIS. getting a job. getting a new job. (the 'dream job'). getting married. buying a house. making new friends. many new friends. learning to run. learning to run far. learning that anything you put your mind to, you *can* achieve. losing my 2 grandfathers who served in WWII. gaining a stepfamily. gaining a goddaughter and her sister. learning to roll with the changes. and to challenge yourself. and learning that change? *is* okay. even if it hurts sometimes.
here's to more in 2010, as they are sure to be more in all of those categories.
travel. camp. canoe in the back country. go to florida with my best girls of 30 (holy. crap. yes 30) years for the first time in 15 years. open a new library. camp more and take cora back to where she belongs. run the chicago marathon. and whatever else comes my way.
as the old college yearbook staff i was part of used to say...
expect the unexpected. because that's always part of life as well.
here's to you and yours into the new year, as we leave one decade and enter another.
cheers...
~jd
6 years, 10 months, 13 days...
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not nearly enough time for the most loyal canine friend i could have ever asked for.
the cancer has become fierce enough that it has made cora not be able to get comfortable any more, meds or no meds.
this is killing us as much as it's literally killing her. but we want her to be pain free and we have known for too long now that this was the eventual end :( the vet today is pretty certain she has a pathological fracture in her left leg due to a bulbous mass on her shoulder that appeared almost overnight. her spirit is still good (which is so SO hard...) but her body? is broken beyond repair :(
so as of december 8, our girl will run free in the next place and we will miss every bit of her being here with us...
blessings to all during this usual merry time of year. i think our christmas will be more subdued this year...and rightfully so when one of the family is missing...
peace & love...
the cancer has become fierce enough that it has made cora not be able to get comfortable any more, meds or no meds.
this is killing us as much as it's literally killing her. but we want her to be pain free and we have known for too long now that this was the eventual end :( the vet today is pretty certain she has a pathological fracture in her left leg due to a bulbous mass on her shoulder that appeared almost overnight. her spirit is still good (which is so SO hard...) but her body? is broken beyond repair :(
so as of december 8, our girl will run free in the next place and we will miss every bit of her being here with us...
blessings to all during this usual merry time of year. i think our christmas will be more subdued this year...and rightfully so when one of the family is missing...
peace & love...
3 out of 4 legs work well...
Posted in on by
but when it's the front leg that you were told 4 months ago had cancer in the bones, i realize one should feel lucky that they got 4 solid months of a happy waggy dog.
her spirit is still awesome. her personality too. but her body? is failing.
and her owner/mom is just heartsick.
not sure how much time is left, but it's likely not too long...
it's going to be a rough week.
on the flip side she's still here now and we're going out for a slower walk that she still loves...
ruminations
Posted in on by
haven't run more than 5 miles in about 5 days.
this weekend i'll run 3, maybe 5 on saturday. it's our 2nd annual runner retreat to celebrate our awesome 2009 season at friend kim's cabin.
since my last post i remembered a smattering of NYC details to share:
Favorite tidbits I failed to mention in the last post, random order.
1) african man holding a sign with "Twizzlers' on it and the african translation handing out candy. just by himself on a corner. then an older (more than 70 i'd say) european man running next to me with his individually wrapped twizzler was not able to open it. Man nudges me, worried or questioning look like 'can you please tear this baby open for me?' i did. he smiled and kept on truckin'. awesome.
2) similar story to above but without the elderly man. an asian woman holding 'Swedish Fish Here' hand made sign in english and kanji or some asian translation and a little gladware full of red swedish fish. again. awesome.
3) a man. with 2 prosthetic legs. changing them out. Mile 10 or so. In the middle of the route/road. With his pit crew of friends helping. WOW.
4) the sound of thousands of runners and sticky shoes. Gatorade Endurance formula was on the course...it's full of more sodium and other 'goodies' to keep us hydrated. it also has to have more sugar in it. because SO MUCH was on the roads, esp the later we got into the race that when we throw our cups to the side, there's always splash out of what you didn't drink (non runners? we usually don't ever down the whole cup...) so with all that gatorade on the road, our shoes literally stuck to the road for a good 1/4 mile past each water stop. very very weird. shluck shluck shluck shluck....as we all kept on pace..
5) related to above? so much water and gatorade on the road led to the cups themselves literally composting down as we ran over them...most races have people with brooms or rakes get the cups over to the side to prevent runners from slipping/tripping on them. but with so many people on the course it was nearly impossible for them to do that at certain points without becoming hazards with rakes. so composted trampled wet clumpy bits of gatorade cups were all over the road. again, just not the norm...and kinda interesting.
it was an amazing event. it took about a full week for the whole experience to really settle in. yes. i WOULD run it again. it was amazingly cool, even if i still can't believe they let me in...
my next event is not until January, unless I become one of the millions (yes that many) on Turkey Day to run a 5K. which I just might. where's one right by my house. can't really pass that up...and i have the whole day off before turkey day to clean house for our house full of friends to attend thanksgiving dinner. no family near here so it's just us and the friends hanging out. much wine, much delicious food, a variety of topics to laugh about and no dysfunction :) amen!
January is when i hope to travel to phoenix to see baby Julia, mom Karen and dad Jerry...it also happens to be when the Rock N Roll Phoenix marathon and half is. Let's not think crazy. I'd be doing the 13.1. this girl is taking retirement seriously. IF i run a marathon at all next year it'll be Chicago. It's on Oct 10th. That would be 10.10.10. Which I think would be awesome karma and a stellar way to remember when I ran it ;) I still remember 8.8.88. The lights went on at Wrigley Field for the first time. I remember such useless things sometimes...but there you have it.
on the homefront, we got back from Winnipeg, Manitoba on Monday. Mark had a big basso profundo solo to sing in a Rautavaara piece last weekend. The choir director flew us both out, put us up in a beautiful hotel and paid Mark on top of that to take part in this. Very cool! Mark is now wishing he could sing full time and ditch retail land. But reality is that singers just don't make the millions...esp basso profundo singers. yet?
Cora is hanging in there but the limping is getting much worse as time goes on. She was great until about 2 weeks ago. I have a sinking feeling we are in a much diff position now than we were all summer. I hope she sticks around for another couple of months but I know reality may not play out that way. We really don't know. The vet is astounded how well she's done til now. But he has told us many times we're really lucky it's gone this way. And that we just have to see how this continues in the coming weeks. Her spirit is still awesome! Her shoulder sadly is not. We'll keep you posted...
On that note, it's time to get some chores done. Peace & love, ~jd
this weekend i'll run 3, maybe 5 on saturday. it's our 2nd annual runner retreat to celebrate our awesome 2009 season at friend kim's cabin.
since my last post i remembered a smattering of NYC details to share:
Favorite tidbits I failed to mention in the last post, random order.
1) african man holding a sign with "Twizzlers' on it and the african translation handing out candy. just by himself on a corner. then an older (more than 70 i'd say) european man running next to me with his individually wrapped twizzler was not able to open it. Man nudges me, worried or questioning look like 'can you please tear this baby open for me?' i did. he smiled and kept on truckin'. awesome.
2) similar story to above but without the elderly man. an asian woman holding 'Swedish Fish Here' hand made sign in english and kanji or some asian translation and a little gladware full of red swedish fish. again. awesome.
3) a man. with 2 prosthetic legs. changing them out. Mile 10 or so. In the middle of the route/road. With his pit crew of friends helping. WOW.
4) the sound of thousands of runners and sticky shoes. Gatorade Endurance formula was on the course...it's full of more sodium and other 'goodies' to keep us hydrated. it also has to have more sugar in it. because SO MUCH was on the roads, esp the later we got into the race that when we throw our cups to the side, there's always splash out of what you didn't drink (non runners? we usually don't ever down the whole cup...) so with all that gatorade on the road, our shoes literally stuck to the road for a good 1/4 mile past each water stop. very very weird. shluck shluck shluck shluck....as we all kept on pace..
5) related to above? so much water and gatorade on the road led to the cups themselves literally composting down as we ran over them...most races have people with brooms or rakes get the cups over to the side to prevent runners from slipping/tripping on them. but with so many people on the course it was nearly impossible for them to do that at certain points without becoming hazards with rakes. so composted trampled wet clumpy bits of gatorade cups were all over the road. again, just not the norm...and kinda interesting.
it was an amazing event. it took about a full week for the whole experience to really settle in. yes. i WOULD run it again. it was amazingly cool, even if i still can't believe they let me in...
my next event is not until January, unless I become one of the millions (yes that many) on Turkey Day to run a 5K. which I just might. where's one right by my house. can't really pass that up...and i have the whole day off before turkey day to clean house for our house full of friends to attend thanksgiving dinner. no family near here so it's just us and the friends hanging out. much wine, much delicious food, a variety of topics to laugh about and no dysfunction :) amen!
January is when i hope to travel to phoenix to see baby Julia, mom Karen and dad Jerry...it also happens to be when the Rock N Roll Phoenix marathon and half is. Let's not think crazy. I'd be doing the 13.1. this girl is taking retirement seriously. IF i run a marathon at all next year it'll be Chicago. It's on Oct 10th. That would be 10.10.10. Which I think would be awesome karma and a stellar way to remember when I ran it ;) I still remember 8.8.88. The lights went on at Wrigley Field for the first time. I remember such useless things sometimes...but there you have it.
on the homefront, we got back from Winnipeg, Manitoba on Monday. Mark had a big basso profundo solo to sing in a Rautavaara piece last weekend. The choir director flew us both out, put us up in a beautiful hotel and paid Mark on top of that to take part in this. Very cool! Mark is now wishing he could sing full time and ditch retail land. But reality is that singers just don't make the millions...esp basso profundo singers. yet?
Cora is hanging in there but the limping is getting much worse as time goes on. She was great until about 2 weeks ago. I have a sinking feeling we are in a much diff position now than we were all summer. I hope she sticks around for another couple of months but I know reality may not play out that way. We really don't know. The vet is astounded how well she's done til now. But he has told us many times we're really lucky it's gone this way. And that we just have to see how this continues in the coming weeks. Her spirit is still awesome! Her shoulder sadly is not. We'll keep you posted...
On that note, it's time to get some chores done. Peace & love, ~jd
the recap of the amazing race...
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pull up a chair. this is my longest story ever.
of course it's completely optional and i realize some of you might likely just scroll through the pictures. have at it...
GO MEB GO!!!
a beautiful dedication statue to fred lebow. the founder of the nyc marathon 40 years ago....(he died of brain cancer in the last decade :( very sad.)
oct 30th. fly to NYC LaGuardia. Check in to the very nice Marriott at the airport.
If anyone ever runs this race in the future, I *highly* recommend going with the travel agency that works with the marathon. *super* reasonable rates at the Marriott and a START LINE BUS on race day. SUPER handy!
never been to New York. it was quite the experience. i think Christmas there would magical. the tree. the twinkling lights. the skating rink. the Barney's windows...okay anyway...marathon weekend was magic in it's own way :)
we went to the expo first.
VERY. AWESOME. amazingly this girl didn't spend a million of Visa's dollars as I just couldn't justify $120 for a jacket just because it had the official ING marathon logo on it....I *have* race jackets. That said, I DID go a little crazy at NikeTown on Saturday with some race gear ;) Not too crazy but a few shirts, new shorts (which yes, i totally wore on race day) and a race hat.
niketown bus :)
the expo had welcome signs in about 6 languages.
it was like 'it's a small world marathon style'. and just as much with the many thousands wandering the aisles of vendors, etc.
and at the expo i met my old friend bart yasso. he's famous in the running world. he has a workout named after him. YASSO 800s. google it if you're curious for more. This man has run just about every race you can. Death Valley. Antarctica. A nudest race. ALL of them almost. Super great man...and he signed my bib for me. good karma there!
Friday night was the pasta dinner at Team MS headquarters. Met some great team members..One had just run the NY Ragnar race. One was a priest at St Patrick's Cathedral. One was a businessman from CA. and the list goes on...very nice folks and we learned our team raised $206,000!!! The largest sum yet that they have ever raised for the NYC MS chapter, and the largest team (about 60 folks). A great way to end our first night in the big apple...good pasta, much running talk and inspiration for those we're running for. During the race, early on, maybe mile 5, a man ran up to me and said "are you running for MS?' me: Yes! Him: "*I* have MS!" Me: "Then I am running for YOU!" and he ran onward in his own race...pretty cool!
team MS at our table...
oct 31st. Halloween. Except, in NYC, it is really hard to know who's in halloween garb and who's version of 'fashion' is different than where I live....
we wandered town a bit, wandered central park *a lot* esp the last 2 miles of the course....
walked the final few miles and saw the finish line for the first time...
found dinner that night in Little Italy. Which is right next to Chinatown. Which I found not that pleasant (Chinatown, ie pirated DVD hawkers on every corner, fake handbags, fake rolexes, all of it. i paid, PAID a DOLLAR to pee in a disgusting burger king. because I had to....
dinner btw? was very pleasant :) example A.
lights out about 11pm with the time change. Runners know that one never sleeps well the night before a race. ESP a big race....
alarm set for 4am on November 1st. alarm doesn't even have a chance to go off. this girl's internal clock just knows when to wake up. 4:10 up and at em.
climb into pre-laid-out race attire.
something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue...
pack up a few essentials. find the start line bus down in the lobby at 5am.
(news break: pictures stop here as I didn't take a camera with me on the course. MANY people did, but I had a goal to make and quite honestly I just didn't want to jostle the camera let alone did I have room for one with 2 water bottles, 6 GU packs, pretzels from the plane, gum & sweet tarts :) I was a running snack market!)
buses arrive at the verazzano bridge at 6:15am or so. find a spot to 'camp out' for a solid 3 hours and chat with the following folks. a 40ish VIP man from Ottawa who's run 14 marathons, a 65 year old gent (school administrator) from Miami who hopes to run 3:50 in his first marathon; a lovely Scottish visitor who gave me his brand new sleeping bag to stay warm in when he left with the first wave, a group of 5 Ireland residents who I loved hearing speak, and 2 ladies from the Netherlands who spoke Danish only. (or so it seemed). Again, can you hear It's a Small World in your head? This was in every sense the 'everyman's Olympics'. I couldn't believe I was here. All of these people within about 10 feet of me. And the many many many other international and stateside visitors...
9:30 or so I started the walk to the start line and to the UPS vans to drop my sweats bag and de-layer at least one layer. Temps when I arrived at basecamp were in the upper 40s and a little rainy. Not ideal but the race itself stayed dry! HOORAY!
9:40 was the start of the first wave of elite men and 'general' population (aka fast) folks. the cannon was shot...and Frank started singing "Start spreading the neeeeeeewsss'....SO COOL! The cannon shook the earth. all of it. SO. COOL. they did that (thankfully) for all 3 waves, so that when you crossed the start line officially Frank was singing his heart out to you and all of your close 14,000 friends. (the # of people the started in each wave). And you heard him on the entire 1.5 miles on the bridge....
My start wave was 10:20 and stupid me forgot to start the Garmin until about 3 minutes into the race. Thank god they have people to keep track of your time for you at events like this ;)
Miles 1-10 or so FLEW. For me, this is saying a lot. I never think the miles just melt away where you are all of a sudden like, whoa, 10 miles down? But this time, it really happened that way.
10-17, steady, kept on. Ran with the 5 hour pace group which is why I met my goal of running sub 5. Also ran with a great awesome girl about my age named Emily. Almost the whole race. She was a New Yorker so I kept asking 'where are we now? which borough is this?' Very helpful to run with a local ;) her 2nd marathon, and the last one was NYC last year. The course was great, the support like none other on the sidelines, but it was work, and the concrete *killed* my joints. I have never been this sore :( Worth it? Totally.
Around mile 11 Emily and I were running on the left side of the road. Fans were yelling our name the whole way for about 3 miles...'go Jennifer! looking good' "Run strong Emily!' and so forth. Finally a voice behind us said 'are you guys famous? how does everyone know your name??' the rule is if you are running a big race, put your name on your shirt! who doesn't want support of strangers telling you to put some hustle in it??
We explained this to Kelly. I know her name because this girl (me) LOVES Sharpies. So at the start line/camp area I found a blue one on the ground. You can't let a good Sharpie go to waste!! So I tucked it in my hip pack. Lo and behold, I said, well, I happen to have a Sharpie. Run with us, and at the next water stop, I'll put your name on the front of your pretty plain white shirt. 30 seconds after scrawling K-E-L-L-Y, sure enough, she got lots of 'Go Kelly!'. happy girl strode on :) and Emily and I kept on our way as well...
After mile 18, this girl was starting to tire. I knew Mark would be meeting me at 22.5 miles in with a banana to have some 'real food' and not have to just be using GU. GU works, but after a while it really can make you feel just blech.
Mile 22.5 I found him. He? Was doinking with the camera. Apparently my sub 5 pace was not in his plans so the one time he was adjusting the camera, he missed taking a picture or two. But I got the banana, so bigger deal sealed :) And? He got to witness the elites and pros as they ran by like cheetahs.
Here's Paula...poor in pain Paula. She's still a phenom to me...
here's the 'general population' running past mark...
Miles 23-26.2. the hardest yet. Emily and I just kept plugging along. We ran most of the course like this. Run a mile, walk a minute. It's the Jeff Galloway training plan. But we did 'blow off' a few walk breaks, esp at the end. Despite the great crowds, it was time to get this DONE.
I told Emily a few times 'if you feel a surge, please by all means go ahead. I'm going to keep this steady pace going and if what you say is true (her Garmin worked the whole time; mine timed out on some of the bridges, etc for some weird reason) we were 50 seconds ahead of pace. She too felt good but not 100% so we hung together til the waning 800 meters. Then she found her pocket of energy and took off. See you soon, I thought.
400 meters to go. Keep going, Just Keep Going. (at this point I literally was talking aloud to get myself there).
200 meters. UH-OH. what is this? This horrible I am going to lose my GU Banana Lunch feeling? DAMN IT. Okay here's the thing. the last 200 meters is RIGHT in front of people who have paid a good small fortune to sit AT the finish line area. Like this...
And THIS is when I got the heaves feeling. I never actually lost my lunch but I had a few good dry heaves (sorry, it's part of the true story) and I literally pulled myself over to the side and stopped for about 20 seconds to either lose it all in front of poor paying people or to breathe through it, regain composure and keep going. I did the latter thank God.) Must. Keep. Going. I haven't worked my ass off to literally have it tank AT the finish....just trot it in....just. believe....a couple of deep breaths later (and this whole lil episode took about 30 seconds if that) I was running towards that beautiful blue line and the silver cloaked runners after it (in their heat blankets). run run run run....
FINISH line crossed. this race? COMPLETE.
THEN it was time to stand and shuffle a few inches, literally, at a time to the UPS trucks with our dry clothes in them in the sweats bags and get our goody bag with an apple, a bagel and a gatorade. But imagine running sub 5 hours and then STOPPING. No stretching. No ice for your legs. Nothing but shuffling for a solid 30 minutes or so. again, another reason I'm so sore. and why almost anyone who ran the marathon was clearly visible from blocks away post race.
However, that all said, it was a phenomenally well organized event for 43,000 runners. And I really can't think of what they'd do differently at the end to prevent the log jam of runners waiting to get their bags and exit the park.
I finally found Mark (brought the cell phone with on the entire journey so I COULD find him quickly at the end and on the course) we took a photo and capped off the most amazing race so far.
On the phone with one of about 5 people...crying tears of 'it's done! and wow!'
Would I do it again? Probably. Next year? Too soon to tell. Did it exceed my expectations? I really don't know what my expectations were except to finish and *maybe* PR (set a personal record). I've got the tiny seed planted that says "Chicago" on it. Not sure though. I'm going to enjoy retirement from 26.2 for a while...a good LONG while...
Finish time? 4:58:27. 17 minutes faster than my last 2 marathons :) I'll take it.
Thank you again for ALL of the phenomenal support from friends near and far. I literally could not have done this without all of you.
Much love,
The retired for 2009 Marathoner
of course it's completely optional and i realize some of you might likely just scroll through the pictures. have at it...
GO MEB GO!!!
a beautiful dedication statue to fred lebow. the founder of the nyc marathon 40 years ago....(he died of brain cancer in the last decade :( very sad.)
oct 30th. fly to NYC LaGuardia. Check in to the very nice Marriott at the airport.
If anyone ever runs this race in the future, I *highly* recommend going with the travel agency that works with the marathon. *super* reasonable rates at the Marriott and a START LINE BUS on race day. SUPER handy!
never been to New York. it was quite the experience. i think Christmas there would magical. the tree. the twinkling lights. the skating rink. the Barney's windows...okay anyway...marathon weekend was magic in it's own way :)
we went to the expo first.
VERY. AWESOME. amazingly this girl didn't spend a million of Visa's dollars as I just couldn't justify $120 for a jacket just because it had the official ING marathon logo on it....I *have* race jackets. That said, I DID go a little crazy at NikeTown on Saturday with some race gear ;) Not too crazy but a few shirts, new shorts (which yes, i totally wore on race day) and a race hat.
niketown bus :)
the expo had welcome signs in about 6 languages.
it was like 'it's a small world marathon style'. and just as much with the many thousands wandering the aisles of vendors, etc.
and at the expo i met my old friend bart yasso. he's famous in the running world. he has a workout named after him. YASSO 800s. google it if you're curious for more. This man has run just about every race you can. Death Valley. Antarctica. A nudest race. ALL of them almost. Super great man...and he signed my bib for me. good karma there!
Friday night was the pasta dinner at Team MS headquarters. Met some great team members..One had just run the NY Ragnar race. One was a priest at St Patrick's Cathedral. One was a businessman from CA. and the list goes on...very nice folks and we learned our team raised $206,000!!! The largest sum yet that they have ever raised for the NYC MS chapter, and the largest team (about 60 folks). A great way to end our first night in the big apple...good pasta, much running talk and inspiration for those we're running for. During the race, early on, maybe mile 5, a man ran up to me and said "are you running for MS?' me: Yes! Him: "*I* have MS!" Me: "Then I am running for YOU!" and he ran onward in his own race...pretty cool!
team MS at our table...
oct 31st. Halloween. Except, in NYC, it is really hard to know who's in halloween garb and who's version of 'fashion' is different than where I live....
we wandered town a bit, wandered central park *a lot* esp the last 2 miles of the course....
walked the final few miles and saw the finish line for the first time...
found dinner that night in Little Italy. Which is right next to Chinatown. Which I found not that pleasant (Chinatown, ie pirated DVD hawkers on every corner, fake handbags, fake rolexes, all of it. i paid, PAID a DOLLAR to pee in a disgusting burger king. because I had to....
dinner btw? was very pleasant :) example A.
lights out about 11pm with the time change. Runners know that one never sleeps well the night before a race. ESP a big race....
alarm set for 4am on November 1st. alarm doesn't even have a chance to go off. this girl's internal clock just knows when to wake up. 4:10 up and at em.
climb into pre-laid-out race attire.
something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue...
pack up a few essentials. find the start line bus down in the lobby at 5am.
(news break: pictures stop here as I didn't take a camera with me on the course. MANY people did, but I had a goal to make and quite honestly I just didn't want to jostle the camera let alone did I have room for one with 2 water bottles, 6 GU packs, pretzels from the plane, gum & sweet tarts :) I was a running snack market!)
buses arrive at the verazzano bridge at 6:15am or so. find a spot to 'camp out' for a solid 3 hours and chat with the following folks. a 40ish VIP man from Ottawa who's run 14 marathons, a 65 year old gent (school administrator) from Miami who hopes to run 3:50 in his first marathon; a lovely Scottish visitor who gave me his brand new sleeping bag to stay warm in when he left with the first wave, a group of 5 Ireland residents who I loved hearing speak, and 2 ladies from the Netherlands who spoke Danish only. (or so it seemed). Again, can you hear It's a Small World in your head? This was in every sense the 'everyman's Olympics'. I couldn't believe I was here. All of these people within about 10 feet of me. And the many many many other international and stateside visitors...
9:30 or so I started the walk to the start line and to the UPS vans to drop my sweats bag and de-layer at least one layer. Temps when I arrived at basecamp were in the upper 40s and a little rainy. Not ideal but the race itself stayed dry! HOORAY!
9:40 was the start of the first wave of elite men and 'general' population (aka fast) folks. the cannon was shot...and Frank started singing "Start spreading the neeeeeeewsss'....SO COOL! The cannon shook the earth. all of it. SO. COOL. they did that (thankfully) for all 3 waves, so that when you crossed the start line officially Frank was singing his heart out to you and all of your close 14,000 friends. (the # of people the started in each wave). And you heard him on the entire 1.5 miles on the bridge....
My start wave was 10:20 and stupid me forgot to start the Garmin until about 3 minutes into the race. Thank god they have people to keep track of your time for you at events like this ;)
Miles 1-10 or so FLEW. For me, this is saying a lot. I never think the miles just melt away where you are all of a sudden like, whoa, 10 miles down? But this time, it really happened that way.
10-17, steady, kept on. Ran with the 5 hour pace group which is why I met my goal of running sub 5. Also ran with a great awesome girl about my age named Emily. Almost the whole race. She was a New Yorker so I kept asking 'where are we now? which borough is this?' Very helpful to run with a local ;) her 2nd marathon, and the last one was NYC last year. The course was great, the support like none other on the sidelines, but it was work, and the concrete *killed* my joints. I have never been this sore :( Worth it? Totally.
Around mile 11 Emily and I were running on the left side of the road. Fans were yelling our name the whole way for about 3 miles...'go Jennifer! looking good' "Run strong Emily!' and so forth. Finally a voice behind us said 'are you guys famous? how does everyone know your name??' the rule is if you are running a big race, put your name on your shirt! who doesn't want support of strangers telling you to put some hustle in it??
We explained this to Kelly. I know her name because this girl (me) LOVES Sharpies. So at the start line/camp area I found a blue one on the ground. You can't let a good Sharpie go to waste!! So I tucked it in my hip pack. Lo and behold, I said, well, I happen to have a Sharpie. Run with us, and at the next water stop, I'll put your name on the front of your pretty plain white shirt. 30 seconds after scrawling K-E-L-L-Y, sure enough, she got lots of 'Go Kelly!'. happy girl strode on :) and Emily and I kept on our way as well...
After mile 18, this girl was starting to tire. I knew Mark would be meeting me at 22.5 miles in with a banana to have some 'real food' and not have to just be using GU. GU works, but after a while it really can make you feel just blech.
Mile 22.5 I found him. He? Was doinking with the camera. Apparently my sub 5 pace was not in his plans so the one time he was adjusting the camera, he missed taking a picture or two. But I got the banana, so bigger deal sealed :) And? He got to witness the elites and pros as they ran by like cheetahs.
Here's Paula...poor in pain Paula. She's still a phenom to me...
here's the 'general population' running past mark...
Miles 23-26.2. the hardest yet. Emily and I just kept plugging along. We ran most of the course like this. Run a mile, walk a minute. It's the Jeff Galloway training plan. But we did 'blow off' a few walk breaks, esp at the end. Despite the great crowds, it was time to get this DONE.
I told Emily a few times 'if you feel a surge, please by all means go ahead. I'm going to keep this steady pace going and if what you say is true (her Garmin worked the whole time; mine timed out on some of the bridges, etc for some weird reason) we were 50 seconds ahead of pace. She too felt good but not 100% so we hung together til the waning 800 meters. Then she found her pocket of energy and took off. See you soon, I thought.
400 meters to go. Keep going, Just Keep Going. (at this point I literally was talking aloud to get myself there).
200 meters. UH-OH. what is this? This horrible I am going to lose my GU Banana Lunch feeling? DAMN IT. Okay here's the thing. the last 200 meters is RIGHT in front of people who have paid a good small fortune to sit AT the finish line area. Like this...
And THIS is when I got the heaves feeling. I never actually lost my lunch but I had a few good dry heaves (sorry, it's part of the true story) and I literally pulled myself over to the side and stopped for about 20 seconds to either lose it all in front of poor paying people or to breathe through it, regain composure and keep going. I did the latter thank God.) Must. Keep. Going. I haven't worked my ass off to literally have it tank AT the finish....just trot it in....just. believe....a couple of deep breaths later (and this whole lil episode took about 30 seconds if that) I was running towards that beautiful blue line and the silver cloaked runners after it (in their heat blankets). run run run run....
FINISH line crossed. this race? COMPLETE.
THEN it was time to stand and shuffle a few inches, literally, at a time to the UPS trucks with our dry clothes in them in the sweats bags and get our goody bag with an apple, a bagel and a gatorade. But imagine running sub 5 hours and then STOPPING. No stretching. No ice for your legs. Nothing but shuffling for a solid 30 minutes or so. again, another reason I'm so sore. and why almost anyone who ran the marathon was clearly visible from blocks away post race.
However, that all said, it was a phenomenally well organized event for 43,000 runners. And I really can't think of what they'd do differently at the end to prevent the log jam of runners waiting to get their bags and exit the park.
I finally found Mark (brought the cell phone with on the entire journey so I COULD find him quickly at the end and on the course) we took a photo and capped off the most amazing race so far.
On the phone with one of about 5 people...crying tears of 'it's done! and wow!'
Would I do it again? Probably. Next year? Too soon to tell. Did it exceed my expectations? I really don't know what my expectations were except to finish and *maybe* PR (set a personal record). I've got the tiny seed planted that says "Chicago" on it. Not sure though. I'm going to enjoy retirement from 26.2 for a while...a good LONG while...
Finish time? 4:58:27. 17 minutes faster than my last 2 marathons :) I'll take it.
Thank you again for ALL of the phenomenal support from friends near and far. I literally could not have done this without all of you.
Much love,
The retired for 2009 Marathoner
here we go....
Posted in on by
here's what i'll wear in 3 days.
here's to the $2450 I raised for MS in honor of Stacy & my aunt...
here's to all of the wonderful supportive friends who will be in my head the whole time..
here's to the amazing race...more after FINISH and a flight home.
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